Just for the record, I don't see you as "attacking me", although I admit I was pretty raw last night and it stung. That's not to say I didn't need to hear it though. The value to me in a place like this is the very essence of what can sometimes be painful- the TRUTH. It's so much easier to see someone heading for disaster, when you're standing as a bystander rather than driving the boat into the iceberg.
I also don't see Cadence as "defending me" so much as I see her coming from the position of having no children together, and virtually no reason to ever run across our S again. I think that is frightening to both she and I, in thinking about that possibility.
We need to all be reminded (and I think this is a perfect example-this conversation we are having the last 24 hours) that every person who makes their way to this place is hurting, as is most every other person we see every day. We have no idea of people's struggles, just b/c they put on a brave front. Although it's true we all bring that pain to this table from different walks of life and situations, the common denominator for us all is HURT. We all have so much to offer each other, and I believe, for the most part, it's a safe place to fall for each of us.
Thank you both for putting so much time and thought into your posts. (And to Ownit- who wouldn't even chime in on here last night, but called me on the phone and talked me off the ledge too!) What blessings to have friends like all of you.
Usually the things we need to hear the most are the very things we are struggling to convince ourselves to do because they FEEL right, but usually are counter-productive to our end goal.
To be continued......
M-60 H-51 M-14 years BD 12/26/16 S 1/1/17
"First the pain, then the rising." Glennon Doyle Melton
