For me it's amazing to see that some one still can "live" in the family house. And Elise and him find it "common" this situation. There are enough possibilities to rent a appartement together...
What do you mean with "For most people, nothing really changes as long as the WAS lives under the same roof. It's really difficult to give them the "time and space" they want when they're living there. Plus it keeps the LBS in limbo, they have trouble letting go if the WAS is right there every day."
In a certain way I think my loved one and wife is "death", I don't recognize her. The new Elise has killed her I think. In some matter we live apart. It is true for me very difficult, but If it would be easy, there were less divorces I think ...
I have commited myself to "live on my own" for one year. But you never know... It can be great too do things on your own and spending energy in your own life to grow.
The wedding ring is still a difficult issue for me. Otherwise I think as long as a wear him, she will think I don't really go further in life. But it is still a symbol for me, even in difficult times not?
Here some updates of the situation:
-Last friday our son became three. Thursday evening I decorated the house for him, ordered cake,... Friday they would came home from holiday with her "new family". In the evening normally she had to work. I was at home from 3:00 pm. I was waiting. At 7:00 pm I received a message that she doesn't had to work. She asked if I had plans otherwise she would stay with the kids with h. I said that I would like to feast our son his birthday. But that I was now very late and that I was very dissapointed. She said that she would still come. But I answered never mind anymore.
-Saturday I said that I would be on holiday with the kids from Thursday till 30 th august. She said she had also looked for a last minute, but everything was expensive. I didn't "bite". "Luckily" I saw a text message from her to him afterwards: She could not believe that I go on holiday with the kids for such a long time on my own. She declared not to do laundry and that I had to pack everything meself.
Some hours later I started doing the laundry Tomorrow I will start packing for the holiday
Afterwards for the first time she went too her dad to speak about the situation. I still have a great connection with him. The two didn't speak because of the "situation".
@Anotherstander: "Oh yes, absolutely. There are plenty of reasons to hope! It just takes a lot longer than you might expect. I've said it before, but if LBS's had more patience I think a lot more M's would be rekindled. But much of the time when the WAS decides to recon, the LBS is done. So be patient and you never know what may happen!"
I can only "hope" but this it not for common men of women... you have to be from Krypton...
I can speak only for myself but I can't still throw my marriage away, if it never happend... Almost 14 years,... what is the meaning then of three months and two weeks and still counting... I don't know...the future will decide.
