Leaving it up to God (but still interfering!)

[Coly23]

Thanks All for your comments and hugs (bttfly). I could really do with a few of those at the moment. My D isn't very huggle now that she is a teenager! My H gave the best hugs, I miss them so much....

Treasur, you are right, it says a lot about him as a person at the moment but it still doesn't stop me from feeling like such a failure. I really do hope he is looking inside himself and reflecting on what he is losing. During our recent chat D said she feels she is so over the whole Dad thing and society only considering you a family if you have both parents and 2.4 kids. I guess she is right. These days it is very rare and I suppose I idealise it because it is what I am used to.

AP, I do feel like I have 'lost the fight' and I'm trying so hard to take some positive learning out of it but its so hard. But you are right I am very proud of what D and I have achieved over the last year. We have become much closer and I think I understand her more now than I ever did. As much as you can understand a 16 year old! Thank you for saying you are proud of me. I am very proud a pond grateful to have such generous caring people like you on this site travelling this long, sometimes lonely road with me.

mleigh, It's good to know that I don't have to make any decisions about H's stuff as yet. I really don't think i can face asking him to get his stuff right now although I have started to slowly pack up his things. That's very weird how your H behaved on your first anniversary post BD. How does someone who one minute worshiped the ground you walked on turn so cold and unfeeling I never know. I won't mention it to H. It's a work day anyway so myself and D will just grab some lunch to take our minds of it.

So as predicted H sent a long text to D yesterday saying he has not seen her for a while and wasn't sure if it was because we have been away or if she just doesn't want to reply but that he just wants to know if she is okay and that he would love to grab a coffee with her. D thought about whether to respond or not and got a little stressed about it. I told her that there was no right or wrong answer but that she should just do what she feels is best for her. She asked me what I would do and I told her that if it as me I would just let H know that i was fine, because he is obviously concerned, but won't mention about meeting up so that is what she did. He responded that he was glad she was okay and again asked to let him know if she wants to get together.

I think for me I was a little annoyed that he thought the reason why she was not responding to him was because we were away and not because she is still mad at him. He really is clueless to what damage he has done.

Anyway, we spent Saturday evening looking after my four year old twin niece and nephew so that helped to take my mind off it. Today we are going to get D ready for her first day if work tomorrow. I am sooo excited!

Happy Sunday everyone!!!