Leaving it up to God (but still interfering!)

[Coly23]

Thanks Job and SKM. Yes I definitely need to take this one day at a time...

So I've been MIA for a while on my thread but I have been reading along and posting when I feel I have something useful to say.

Journaling - The summer has been going okay although it has been very wet so far so not great for days out. D has been a bit down lately. I think she may be suffering from a bit of PTSD. She said that when H left she was in the throws of building up to her final exams so she had that to occupy her mind but now that she has been off for a couple of months it seems to have started to sink in, the enormity of it all. Because if this she became very distant with her boyfriend and girl friends and consequently has been falling out with them all resulting in her boyfriend telling her that she has been a bad girlfriend and they have now split up. She is understandably very upset with this because she was looking to him for support and he couldn't give it.

In the meantime H has been texting and phoning her at least two or three times a week and she has chosen to ignore him. I did suggest that if he asks how she is and at the same time asks to see her and if she doesn't want to see him then maybe to be polite she should just respond to say that she is okay but she declined to do that. I even suggested that I could drop H a text to ask him to back off a bit whilst she sorts herself out but she said that would imply that she will see him at some point in the future but she feels she has made her mind up that she doesn't want to see him anymore. That makes me feel really sad. I wonder how he would feel about it if he knew. The H I knew would be mortified and very sad about it but I don't know this new person so I can't speculate on how he is feeling. All I know is that both myself and D do not want the type of relationship he is offering. We would rather be on our own than have him pop up every now and again reminding us of how he rejected us all over again.

We've also been trying to find a little summer job for D to take her mind off everything and I am pleased to say that she starts a little admin job in my office on Monday! I am so excited for her! She has also started to come to the gym with me and I'm going to get her membership so she can go more regularly. We are doing a lot of things together at the moment and it seems to have brought us much closer.

In other news. This month is my seventh wedding anniversary and then two days later will be my birthday. This time last year I was a mess. I don't know how I am going to feel on those two days this year. I think there will obviously be some sadness but I don't think i will feel as emotional as last year. I would love to send a text to H to say happy anniversary but I assume that would not be a good idea!

Anyway, I hope everyone is good today/tonight. It's nearly the weekend - yippee!!