I understand you missing your partner. You have always had one and it is really an adjustment. I'm onto 9 years with intermittent dating and 2 short term R's. I lost 2 jobs over the course of 9 years and I have a 10 year old. It was scary as all heck.
You know what? I came out of it all. When I thought I might not be able to take it anymore, I did.
Do you have friends, family, anyone you can talk to? It doesn't always have to be a partner. You see an IC, right? My IC is one of my favorite people to talk to about my struggles. She is validating, complimentary, and gives me coping skill. I look forward to seeing her.
I echo what cadence said. You are more than a safety net and I am glad to see you are valuing yourself. And triple ditto on the strongest relationships aren't when you need someone, but when you want them.
Your best days with yourself are still yet to come.
