It's just not helpful to say someone is gullible without offering further information.
This process is incredibly hard. We should be supportive on here rather than be critical and cynical. Unless there is a broader point to be made.
Tobias,
You're absolutely correct, we should be supportive and criticism should be offered in a constructive manner rather than being terse and offensive. I'm usually rushed for time so I often write short and simple comments, but in many cases a good response requires more than a snarky remark. My comments are meant to be supportive, but I realize that my comments are often unnecessarily edgy.
In addition, it's been a long time since I was in the throws of a pending divorce and I've forgotten how difficult and agonizing it can be when you're in the thick of a potentially life changing event. I tend to have little patience when I feel like a spouse is being used as a doormat. I was often a doormat, so when I believe someone else is suffering through that kind of abhorrent behavior then I often respond emotionally and with vigor. In the vernacular, it makes me want to beat the living sh*t out of an OM that would do that to another man (via the man's wife). I'm guessing that response is due to my blue collar roots.
As for your situation, I believe tossing your wife out would greatly improve your chances of a lasting reconciliation, but I'm divorced and I'm I wrong far more often than I'm right. And feel free to toss anything I say right back at me.
So there you have it. I agree that the hard-line is not the way of DB, but I've always maintained that I'm terrible at DB. Just think of the h3ll my XW must've gone through for 16 years.
