And to be really honest, I know I loved my H and I know why I loved and appreciated him and our M so much. I still see him and our M as a great blessing to feel gratitude about.

I have no idea if he ever loved me, or why or if he ever actually honestly valued me or our M. Or if he would see me or our M as a blessing, a curse, a lie or a terrible mistake. No idea. Based on his actions, doesn't look like he saw much value in either me or our M, but it doesn't change how I feel about it/him even now.

Me: 53 H:38
T:20 M:14
BD ILYB etc 10/15, H diagnosed severe depression
S 1/16
PA 4/16
H filed 1/17