Fair point about controlling, OwnIt, but I also think I have the right to my own boundaries. Perhaps I just need some control over bits of my own life and psyche. You're also right about listening, but the selfishness of MLC does not change the fact that this is my life too.
If it isn't a dialogue, I don't need to be involved. He can write a letter or talk to other people. I can walk away without an explanation now when I couldn't have done even a few months ago.
If it is a dialogue, I need to feel a bit safer than I do. To avoid controlling the space to feel safe, I need a 3rd party there to do that.
To keep my focus on GAL and my own goals, I need it to have some structure and to sit on the edge of my life not the centre.
To not lose the strength and detachment I have fought so hard to gain, I need an endpoint in sight. 2 years of confusion and chaos is enough. Hence, my choice of boundary that, for me, when we are legally divorced, I will have no contact with him of any kind so I really let it go.
Me: 53 H:38 T:20 M:14 BD ILYB etc 10/15, H diagnosed severe depression S 1/16 PA 4/16 H filed 1/17
