New to the journey and thank you.

[Kylo]

So today we're at lunch at a restaurant with my family. My brother asks what the special is. This almost always reminds me of the scene in Dumb and Dumber, where Jim Carrey asks what the soup du jour is. And the waitress replies "The soup of the day", and Jim Carrey says: "Sounds great. I'll have that." So I repeat the line. My wide turns to my sister-in-law and groans about the "same old jokes", like she is really mad about it! I'm smiling as I type it, it's so funny and so textbook MLC. On the flipside, it just makes me want to say GTFO. Funny and maddening at the same time, and pathetic.

She had said she needed a job that made at least $50,000 to start out on her own, (with no college degree). Well I find one for her, and she is wishy-washy about it. She says she wants more.

She already knows how to do this job. It has full benefits, normal hours, puts her back in the workforce, she could stay here and build up a little war chest, she could get out of the house soon, which as of a couple weeks ago, is what she really wanted. It seems so BPD, just wallowing in the misery.

Now that I have stopped moving the divorce ball forward, nothing is happening. I wonder how long it will be until she decides to put a little effort into getting out of this "terrible marriage that has been terrible for years" and that she was "faking it for so long".

I put some time in and was able to find the MLC, and then find the BPD (I actually started with searching for "why can't my wife admit when she is wrong, and didn't quite find a good match. It was a post on this site that sent me to the getting better site that crystalized it; and no I don't take what Shari says as gospel.) I can only imagine how hard it would be, how lost I would feel if I hadn't. I probably would have pestered her at least some, to find out what was going wrong.