MIL eventually yelled (like seriously YELLED) at her to shut the hell up.
Go, MIL?
East, things must be really bad if MIL is not supporting her daughter and wants her to give D to you. This is odd behavior for a MIL. Are things safe for D?
Quote:
I'm beginning to think that STBXW has something seriously wrong with her.
It's possible. Look up Cluster B personality disorders and see if any of those ring a bell. You'd never be able to diagnose her and you'd never want to tell her (if she does have one she'd never seek treatment anyway.) I tell you to read for your own research. If one sounds familiar, you may be able to understand triggers in advance to help yourself. That's the only reason I tell you.
There are books on divorcing/shared custody with high conflict exes. I can't recommend any for you here but they're out there.
Quote:
because I'm not supposed to have any contact with you and you keep on
East, what does that mean? That's the second time she's referred to her not having contact with you. Why is she saying she's not supposed to have contact with you? Is she dreaming up some sort of imaginary no contact/order of protection?
Can you ask MIL?
You are supposed to be co (or parallel) parenting with W, so why is she saying she can't talk to you? She's going to need to. D is only 6, and parents will have to coordinate her care.
It's important to know what she means.
Quote:
Anybody have any experience with this? How the heck am I supposed to be getting her in trouble talking about our kid? And she could call me last night and tell me she was deciding that D lived with her now and that was ok? I understand a lawyer saying, "don't have any unnecessary contact" but this makes it sound like I have a restraining order against her or something and I'm trying to bait her into violating it.
Send W an email asking what she means when she says she's not supposed to be talking to you and what that means for parenting? Tell her that you are not aware of any legal measures that have been taken that would prevent co-parenting D, and you are concerned about this statement for D's sake.
(Email, do not call. In contentious/high conflict cases, phone calls are risky because there is no documentation coming out of them. Switch to written communication as much as possible to avoid "he said/she said"s particularly when your ex has shown signs of wanting to cut you out of the picture.)
If she won't answer, ask MIL.
Most of all, talk to your L about this strange statement by W. Also, I hope your L knows about W's statement about being "scared of you" because of the yelling she said you did (but didn't actually happen.) This is a woman trying to set you up and hopefully your L has dealt with ugliness like this before.
Also document dates and times of things your W does. Like keeping D until the evening and withholding the school supplies. This is annoying for you, but would cause D to be the one to suffer. Take note of things like this as it could help your case. (And need I tell you that you should be sending emails? "W, D arrived the night before school with none of the school supplies that were already purchased for her. I am afraid of what this will do to her, as surely she will be embarrassed on the first day of school. East.")
I am so happy D is with you and can start school in the district she is supposed to be in.
