Still here. Still not detached...

[JRuss]

I thought for probably the first year or so post-BD that if I could just get her to commit to, and then dive into, MC, we'd make it. I never really stopped to consider that she'd blow up our family without at least honestly trying MC. She really never gave me any reason for hope, but I did until maybe late fall of last year.

So nothing really "worked", from a save-the-marriage perspective. Not DB or anything else. My W really was done long before she told me, and it was never anything other than her trying to figure out how long the exit would be. A trial physical separation might have worked, I guess, but I wasn't willing to move out (didn't want to be seen as abandoning children for custody reasons), and she wasn't, either, until the D was pretty much done and dusted. So it was file for D, wait the required three months, and she moved out a month before it went final.

GAL worked for me, though, and continues to work for me and my kids.