Still here Sandi, Thank you for checking up on me.
The day after my last post.
W wanted to talk. One of the goals in the list she may have read, was no R talks. So I know she purposely wanted to test me. At first I said I dint wanna talk about it, but then I caved in. We had a 3 hour long communication.
I made some mistakes. I mentioned that she is going through an emotional state and mentioned a few points, basically describing w fog, without saying the name. I asked about the addiction feeling, she said no she did not feel addicted. In the convo i mentioned rewriting history and at some point she realized (maybe she was faking it). I mentioned the value to transparency and the betrayal due to the lack of it.
She cried in self pity, I think. And said she wants a D and I said how badly I wanna move forward with my life and get out of this mess and how I am looking forward to my future without her. No arguments just discussions. At some point she mentioned she wants to take it day to day. We also discussed a separate place to live for her to move into.
PS: She thinks my IC is brainwashing me. She seems to be curious to know if my IC is a M or F.
I gloated a bit about my GAL activities and having new goals in my life forward.
I know she still wants to be with OM and wants me as a backup plan. I think she wants to move out f around and then come back think that I will be waiting for her.
Next morning, the day before she goes on the trip to visit her parents, she wanted to discuss an evening event we were supposed to go to. It was a get-together at my friends house, whose w happens to be a good friend of mine. I said it looks like a couples' event, a few other couples were invited, and I didn't wanna go. She said we should as his/her friends. I said in that case we should go in separate cars. She didn't like that. Later on she said her friends wanna take her out for drink because she won't be here for her bday, and she would like to leave early from there. and now she was ok with taking separate cars. Btw it's the same group of friends OM belongs to. Later on we didnt agree on timing when I asked her to shift the time 30 minutes later. She said she doesn't want to go the mutual friend's anymore. It was clear to me she didn't wanna sacrifice the time with OM. I said ok and that was that. Came home from work, she was sitting in the living room, almost looked like she wanted me to talk about going together. I didn't. Went to the gym. when I came back she was gone. Then I spent an hour with S9 and went out to GAL.
