The words are where they need to be but words are easy. Actions are all that matters. You can tell her that. There's no time limit to fixing this. You two need to map out the path back together. It can't include you being the marriage police. She's right in that you have to put on the table to work all the issues before the A. The A is the big enchilada but there were many things going on that led that way. The A is ZERO percent your fault but those pre-A issues are at least 50% your fault. You guys have to include working on those things as part of your path back to happiness with each other.
You two fell in love once. Were very attracted to each other, probably couldn't keep your hands off each other. Remember the things that first attracted you to each other.
It's ok to acknowledge that she's "saying" all the right things but follow that up with that she has to "show" you that she's all-in. Actions are literally all that matter at this point.
