What should I be doing now? (Filing for D soon)

[Coconut]

Blu, I'm listening, I'm trying to open a door and see what she does. I Loved her dearly once, I wouldn't want to give up the opportunity for it to happen again, but it would take a lot. She doesn't need to say what I wrote, my point was that I don't need her to put me on a pedestal as 25mlc wrote, just that I would need to see remorse and recognition of what she did.

tobias, I've reached out to see how she's doing, I've let her know I've forgiven her and am no longer angry, and I've apologized to her for my lackluster performance as a husband... but I'm not going to take on her responsibility to be remorseful. I will NOT take one step forward to a R without her being remorseful, I am not willing to move forward without that. And part of being remorseful, is removing that part of her life from her life. As for actions, there's only two things I told her I would need, she's done neither. And to add to that, she's become a crappy mom (from my sons lips).


As for divorce, 1 year, 5 years, 10 years... what's the difference, really? She disposed of me, I've taken a year getting over that, and I'm in a place where I'm ready to start over. Whether we start a R in the future together, or I start one with someone else, I don't see a reason to delay the D any more unless I see something that says reconciliation is moving forward (even if it is just her foot in the door).

If I met someone today that I was interested in, I wouldn't hesitate to see where that would go (I'm not looking but if it's staring me in the face), and I don't want to get into a situation where I'm divorcing one woman while I'm dating another. I want to get rid of as much baggage as possible to limit issues in the future.