Didn't want to update so soon again but there is a little bit of a conversation with W that I felt would be interesting to share.
So you know how W mentioned how she didn't have joyous memories of being married on our wedding day? I knew she had been focusing only on the bad but last night we had a friend over and she suddenly said how an idea would be to hire a maid service while we go away for some time of the weekend. We have been struggling to keep up with the chores and especially with me doing 180s and not always doing everything immediately but rather wait until we have a moment to do things together or do a division of labor...well we keep having other things interfere to have the energy to do it.
I know. Some would say: how great for her to say that in front of the friend (who knows about OM) and she is pretending. I suppose it is a possibility. But ever since W has been on an empowerment tour I can see her open up more. Yesterday she got behind the wheel of that friend's car who gave her some basic instructions in a parking lot. She has been planning the GRE. She is taking her medical issues seriously and makes appointments (so far just for eyes not yet the gynecologist) but this woman is really trying. She is also really trying to not let my quirks get to her like they did in the past. Instead she calmly brings it up. We just need to figure out IF what the other person needs is what either one of us can provide and is willing to provide. When I provide her space she is much more relaxed and warm towards me and even when she doesn't feel like it she still tries to show affection.
