maybe you don't need to get bogged down so much in your w's history or her personality & her background, etc, and what you think she thinks/feels...
Because you said you don't think NC with OM will ever happen. Is that accurate?
How does that make you feel? I know you want to save the m. I get that.
And You have said you are willing to separate.
Bottom line is, Is that^^^ really true? Can you see how it might help things, to sep?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016