New here, really need advice

[AMartin]

Hi all -

Last week, my H had once again withdrawn sex & affection from me, and I was losing my mind, basically. We had a discussion, I think it was last Tuesday, when he told me that when we first started having sex again after he broke it off with the OW, that it was better than it was before, probably the best it'd ever been. I agreed. He said that he stopped because it felt empty emotionally. I said that was because he refused to do anything our counselor recommended to rebuild either trust or intimacy after his affair. He wouldn't say whether or not he was willing to work on the relationship with me, at all. This is the 3rd time he has decided, on his own without any discussion or any attempt to fix whatever was wrong, to withhold sex & physical affection from me.

I couldn't take anymore. At all. My best friend and her family were going out of town for the next week, and had asked my son - 18 - if he'd house sit for them. I asked my son if he minded if I house sat instead. I told him I needed to time to myself. He knows that DH and I were having trouble.

I haven't spoken or texted my husband since that night, last Tues. I was home W, TH & F. I ignored him unless he asked me a direct question. I packed my things for the week Saturday morning and left without a word. I don't know if this is what I should be doing. Nothing else is working. I felt like he needs to know that I'm serious. This isn't acceptable. I am not his punching bag. He cannot play with my love and emotions like this.

Our son is going off to college in Chicago in 3 weeks. I'm not sure how much to tell him, or how to act around H while we're all together. When we move him in, the day before my birthday, we're also going to parent orientation stuff for 3 days up there. How do I handle that? I'm already a wreck. I'm so excited for DS, but I feel like my entire world is blowing up.

This has to be the hardest thing I've ever done. It's nice being on my own, but I miss them both terribly.