WAS wanting to move across the world - help

[leahsue]

Hi whywhy,
Sorry I haven't responded. So many new people coming to the board, and trying to keep up with each one is challenging. I just wanted to reach out and encourage you. I know it's so hard, especially in the early parts of this, and when you see your W appearing to be so totally OK without you.

One thought I had was- I'm not sure when you are speaking about the calls from her to the kids- are you face-timing? B/C when you say I do it with a big smile, etc. The talking to her seems to be a trigger for you to go into sad mode, so maybe suggest to her that she text you when she's ready to talk to the kids, and then let them answer the phone or face time or whatever, and you don't interact with her at all on these calls.

It may be hard for you to give up that contact with her, but if it makes you spiral downward, it may be something to consider. Just tell her you'd rather than talk to her, but will be glad to set it up for the kids. But say it in a very upbeat way, just kind of- I've got too much going on and don't really have anything to say to you, but I'm happy to provide the chat time for the kids and her.

Just my 2 cents. Hang in there. It really does get easier.