I am glad to read that you are making time for you.

Was there regret in H's words about taking 20 years to discuss some stuff with you? Maybe he wishes that wasn't the case. I don't mean now but over the years. At the moment I doubt he thinks that could change even if he wanted it to.

For the record I don't think you are a sap!! I understand where the comment stems from though. Life will be better.!

Best wishes

R 25 years
M 14 years
S11 & S13
Working on it alone since Oct 2014
M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years)
Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr.
Next R chat Aug'17
Still together