I'm almost done reading DR. I think I misunderstood the LRT and drop the rope technique.
Yesterday in a discussion I told her that I am preparing myself for my future without her and have an IC to help me through the process so no matter what I will come out a stronger person. We should start talking about co-parenting and schedules after she returns from her trip to visit her parent overseas. I also suggested that she should move out of MBR since she hasnt been faithful. She still denies the A btw and says he's just a friend that is helping her through this. I told her I didnt believe her. Also disclosed my plans to sell the business and home once we decide to move forward with the D. She still goes on and on about how it has nothing to do with the OM and all my fault I validated each time. Should I have not shown her all my cards.
Hey Sean, what is your motivation for the above convo? Are you finished with her and you want to push forward with D? Or do you think this is going to "wake her up"? Because if it's the former then that's fine, but if it's the latter then it's too early for this. She's likely to agree and push forward with D except blame you for it claiming it's what YOU want (which is kind of what you portrayed above). If you are standing for your M then you should not have had this convo in any way, shape or form.
Quote:
She still goes on and on about how it has nothing to do with the OM and all my fault I validated each time.
Can you give a very specific example of what she said and what your validation was? Because I think you may misunderstand validation (which is not unusual, a lot of people misunderstand it early on). The above scenario is not really a time for validation, or an opportunity for it, so I'm confused that you say your response was to validate.
