I think I may have answered your question on your thread. Also, go back and re-read the very first page of this thread and there are some ways of how not to pursue someone.
As for the pain, you will need to work through that pain and not try to find ways to just ease it, i.e., like the MLCer. It's best to bust right through it and yes, it will take time to do so, but you can do it. I know that you can!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
