Right, my H was going on vacations, very enthralled with OW and avoided any discussions with me. We didn't talk much if at all. He didn't want to talk about anythign because it reminded him of the life he was trying to erase.
Yes he filed a few weeks after BD. Actually the BD for me was coming home to find out he had left. There was no conversation until many weeks later.
When we were piecing and R ... I asked a lot of questions about why he came back, what he was thinking, etc etc because I wanted to know everything. I tried to come back here and help others with that knowledge because at the time a lot of people on this board thought my H was one of the most terrible ones they had seen.
As far as the D process... he said that he didn't like his lawyer and had just filed and never heard anything more. That he wsa told these things take a long time. He said once my L started pressing his is when he started seeing reality. How permanent his choices were and how badly it would affect the boys. This put him in a bad mood, miserable, and OW didn't like it. He wasn't the fun carefree guy to go out and live this wild fantasy life.
So I'm not sure what that answers for you. That he wasn't concerned about pursuing D because he was living his new life. That he had filed and felt like that was enough to clear his conscience and that he said he was pressured into filing because OW wasn't going to put up with his old life mixing with his new life. But once he was held to the fire it started taking its toll on him. He and OW started having problems because from what he told me *which who knows the truth* she didn't like that he had to be in contact with me. He didn't like that he would text me while they were away for the weekend even if it was regarding kids or bills. She just didn't like that he had a past. H doesn't deal well with people telling him what to do or being negative, then he turns miserable. He said he turned miserable and she didn't want to be around him and he decided it was time to move out of her dads and get his own place, then they split up and well the rest is history.
