Trying to detach from WTF world

[Treasur]

How do you know when detachment moves to not wanting your spouse back, even if it were possible? Do any of you feel that? Have any of you seen someone you recognise still after MLC fog?

I feel like I'm standing on a funny dotted line between detachment and no expectations and detachment because I WANT to walk away. Practically I don't know if it changes my actions as things are right now, but it is niggling at me.

I love my husband but I know the old M is dead and I mourn most of it. But I don't know if he even exists anymore behind this strange man he has become. I used to have faith that the core of him was still in there but I really don't know. And no-one healthy would want who he seems to be now.