He is such a POS. Came in my room to say goodnight to the boys. Doesn't kiss the baby or anything if I'm holding him god forbid he gets too close to me. He said goodnight to the boys not a word to me, mind you they are laying in bed right next to me so it's not like I'm far away, anyway S9 said you have to kiss mommmy and say goodnight. H acted like he didn't hear and asked what movie they were watching. S9 kept saying it like 5 times and H ignored so I finally said S9 shhh and H walked out.
Stooping to his level? What? You gonna emotionally balckmail the guy to say goodnight? Come on, T, don't do that kind of stuff and then say it's for the sake of the kids. You just sat there while S9 continued trying to get your H to say goodnight.....how many times? Why would you do that? I'm sorry, but there is nothing attractive about a woman allowing her child to go on & on.......b/c it strongly hints of you wanting to see H respond with some type of acknowledgement of you.
I wonder sometimes if I am the only one who see LBS's lie to themselves about how some action is for their kids.....IDK, maybe it's just that I am the only one who would dare suggest it. IMHO, this has more to do with your feelings for H, than with the kids. I think it would only hurt you, to impose these actions on a man who clearly does not want it. If you don't want the kids seeing it, then step out of the room when he enters. Why are they all in your room when you know he's going in there to tell them goodnight?
As I've previously suggested, you need to have a conversation with the boys. If you don't, then S9 will continue asking H along on family outings and pushing him to kiss mommy goodnight. Is your subconscious wanting S9 to do it?
I still think H has been advised to spend xx amount of time in the home, either so you can't charge for abandonment, or whatever. I don't think he wants to be there for the sake of the kids. It's too obvious he is not trying to bond with his baby.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
