Maybe a shark is not needed, but I'm saying do what it takes to get a wage garnishment or direct deposit from your h's income
so you are not waiting for him to "GIVE" you money every month.
I think money h has sent me has, literally, arrived on different days and or in different amounts every single month. Not once has he texted or emailed to say it's coming/won't be, how much, etc. Never.
Hard to make plans with that type of budget.
T3, here's what I believe you must hammer into your mind about your h
which you resist...
your h lies by commission
he gives out inadequate information, (lies by omission)
or pieces of the truth intended to deceive ("I told you I was riding the motorcycle" TRUE ---"I did not say I bought it")
My "great guy" DOCTOR h, will not do the right thing when no one is looking.
And even when they are looking, he distorts the narrative so much he has no apparent remorse or negative consequence that he cares about...
He does such mindfu#kery that I'm sitting here empty handed, seeing my d19 without college money, money which h is either hoarding or spending on his new family -where I presume he is adored for his awesomeness and
after 35 years of marriage I have no financial security, yet. Me Working full time is mandatory, but my resume has an 18 year gap...h has a pristine resume (you're welcome).
H hid money I now don't get unless I spend a lot of borrowed cash to hunt for it, and
I could go on --- but as far as I know, this is New behavior from my h. I would not have predicted it. I'm still, sadly, able to be disappointed by him. H has erased our family and marriage. And I'm incredulous.
I'm saying you are as forewarned as you get. Forewarned is forearmed.
Get as much financial info as you can without having to subpoena his records and look for a trail to other "him only" accounts.
Would his boss help him hide income? I don't want you to spin, I want you to protect yourself & your boys & tell your L this.
A guy who can justify an affair with a pregnant wife and walk away from her & 3 boys including a newborn,
and had an affair before, and blames HER for making him leave "Because she doesn't trust him enough", is already doing things most men would not justify. (I would hope).
I am sorrier than you can know.
But as I said, i'm in the trenches now. So on one hand I'm learning valuable lessons I want to pass on, on the other hand I'm trying not to project.
Learn what you can, disregard the rest.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
