I don't know the "rules" of DB, and I think situations can vary quite a bit, but it's my belief that when cheating is involved you need to set an appropriate boundary and take decisive action. The doodler version of if goes like this:
1. Stop cheating or get out. 2. Go out and GAL and move on with life.
If the spouse wants to come back, then you deal with it when and if that happens.
