Was wondering if someone could clear something up for me...
It's mentioned on these boards that the BS needs to detach to aid in the possible recovery of their WW's A BUT for R of their M to happen the WW needs to go NC with his/her AP! Surely If detachment is required for the WW to get over her AP then us BS detaching from them would have the same affect..!
Is detaching from our WS meant to help us "get over" our W/H OR does it help in the recovery? I just can't see where on one hand we need to detach to help in recovery when we then state that the WS needs to go NC with the AP. Detachment must have the same affect both ways...
Detachment serves a two fold purpose.
It is mostly for us as it seperates us from the MLC/WAS and their crazy antics. It takes us off of the rollercoaster where we are adding fuel to their drama and enabling it to continue.
It also seperates the WAS from us and lets them eventually figure out that we were not the cause of their PAIN, maybe at that point they will look within and figure out what they need to do to fix their issues and not continue to run away from them.
As far as the relationship between the WAS and the affair partner, that can not continue if you are going to have a new relationship with your spouse.
