Tread, I no longer hold the rope... heck, the callouses that it caused have even healed now. also, I think telling other peoples spouses are possibly running around behind their back because they didn't ostracize my wife for doing so, is pretty harsh and detrimental to other marriages.-
Agreed. Long details do not benefit you in the long run; they make you look petty and vindictive and maybe even dishonest.
There is a tendency in our society to WANT to blame the victim so that people think it won't happen to them. The more details you provide the more fodder you give them, ironically.
(Any detail that varies from THEIR lives, shows that you deserve this, AND OR any details that are at odds with your wife's, creates doubt & fuel for debate AND OR anything you actually do get wrong, like where the concert was, or whatever, costs you credibility). Try to see these idiot moments as opportunities to show your honor & strength.
The "oh so supportive" friend's wife, could have done much of what your post said - without me necessarily thinking she supported your wife in deceit.
UNTIL
the story concoction to meet OM... that was the first clear boundary crossing (I mean, did the friend want to see if this guy was a charlatan axe murderer so she could warn your w not to leave you???)
THEN unfriending you after the text expressing your pain (which I assume was not vulgar or threatening) was when she made clear that somehow, for whatever reason
she has officially and needlessly chosen.
I have no idea why the kid said "she says hi". WTF? But don't spend another precious brain cell on that brainscrew.
Helping a woman lie to her h is deceit; it's not just being supportive to your friend. There is a distinction that is not always clear, but this one was clear.
Years ago, A long time friend of mine asked me once to say I was with her the previous night "in case h asked".
I was mostly offended, to be honest. I said "Friend, we've known each other since elementary school. Is this really the type of thing you think I would help you with?
You could hide in my house for a year if he was violent, but lying to him about where you were last night? Um, NO..."
She never asked again.
Sorry you had to deal with that. Stress to your "still friends" how much you value their friendship and try your a$$ off to be upbeat around them. I know, I know, this all stinks.
But some of these people mean a lot to you, right? I think this will be temporary, but it's like a little turd on top of the $h1t cake you have been served.
((( )))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
