I'm going to try and keep the background info short:
I introduced my wife to 2 of my high school friends that are married after we got together. I have known them for almost 30 years, so it was nice when my wife and my friend (female) really hit it off and enjoyed hanging out throughout our M. They weren't "best" friends, but would hang out or talk once a month or so.
Anyway, this friend happened to be the first friend that my W talked to about her A (after I found out about it), and this friend somewhat supported my W relationship with the OM. They would talk about OM and what was going on, she basically gave my WW someone to share that seedy part of her life with.
So it came to a head when I found out that my WW and this friend had concocted a story (that they were going to tell me) of going out together one night, so that they could meet up with OM so my friend could meet him. I heard my WW tell OM that she really wants to meet you.
Anyway, when I found out about this, I pretty much lost it. I tried calling my friend, who didn't answer, then I text her that I couldn't believe she was supporting my W having an affair, and that she really hurt me and I was disappointed in her.
After I text her, she blocked my number on her phone, and unfriended me on all social media, and we never spoke again. Although I've also been friends with her H since highschool, we don't hang out unless it's with other people, and just happens that I haven't seen him, or spoken to him, since that day.
I saw on facebook about 3 days ago that her and her husband moved to my state recently, and happened to move right next to my best friend from high school (the only person I knew when I moved to NC), and all 4 of us where friends back in high school, so they also know each other and hang out.
I go to my buddie's house for Sunday dinner often, his mother (who I also know very well) also goes over and we have a big family dinner. Last night I walked in the house and his youngest daughter tells me that my WW's friend says hello. I kind of just sat there because she used her first name, and I was trying to process if she was talking about her or someone else with the same name, and finally I said that's great, tell her I said hello. At one point the kids went outside and my buddies wife says that she's sorry that she said that, the kids aren't aware of any issues between me and that friend.
I wasn't going to mention anything to my buddy and his wife about what had occurred in the past with this friend, although I don't like the person my friend showed herself to be, I don't carry around any anger towards her and would just be cordial to her.
But when my buddies wife said that, I asked my friend what that was about (as his wife quickly went out back), and what friend had told them. He said nothing really, just that I had had issues with her because she was friends with my W after our S.
So I told my buddie that it wasn't about her simply being friends with my W, it was that she supported something my W was doing that was detrimental to our marriage. then the kids came back in the house and that was all that was said.
Ok, so here's my issue.
I'm pissed... I wasn't going to bring anything up about it at all, was just going to be cordial when she was around and not start drama. But now, she's told them we don't "get along", which is fine with me, but instead of telling them the truth about why, she made it seem that I was upset about something as petty as her picking my wife's "side" after our split.
My instinct is to just lay it out for my buddy so he knows the truth, but I'm still hesitant because I don't want to surround myself with drama, and I also don't want to create drama for my buddy and our other friends (his new neighbors).
Watcha think?
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
