Trying to detach from WTF world

[Treasur]

Funny how that default 'mind-reading' switch flicks on isn't it? Currently it feels like I'm dealing with two versions of the same MLC person...Evil Teenage Monster in the D process, something slightly different in emails and his desire to talk.

I'd asked him to return, via my lawyer, a couple of sentimental items including a photo album. I was angry when I asked and then it stung this morning to get a couple of them through the post. Things that my original H who was a sentimental hoarder treasured. Off goes my spinning head...well the fact he returned them just shows how little you and your M mean to him now...blah blah in my head.

Toddler detached head said. You don't know how he felt about returning them only that he did return some of the items you asked for. For all you know, he might have felt upset, or guilty that he doesn't deserve them, or nothing, or irritated or....You don't know and it's a waste of time to pretend you do.

If there is any bit of my H there behind the MLC storm, it would have upset him especially the photos. And I was angry enough to want to hurt him when I felt so powerless a few months ago. But I don't know. If I am detached but think 'as if', I suppose I think that I treasure them still even if he doesn't now, that I can keep them safe for him if there is a time when he does again and I have the reassurance of knowing that my photos are not being perused by stalking OW. That's enough.

Gosh though this detachment stuff is like basic mental training isn't it?