Boston Dad in need of Help

[Teppo]

If you choose to confront her, here's what I want you to do:

1) Tell her you know about her relationship with OM and that you consider it to be a betrayal
2) You will not accept being with someone who is in a relationship with someone else, therefore you want her to (move out of the MBR, move out of the house, whatever you want)

(Think about what you're going to do if she says "no")

3) Think about anything else you want to do -- if she's texting him on a phone you're paying for, tell her you're going to cancel her mobile plan/phone and she can go get her own if she wants to use it to text with OM

Thanks Acc and Hoosjim for your input.

The thing is, I can't threaten to cut off her phone since the one she uses is provided by her firm. Also, I've already asked her to leave the master bedroom. When I did that, about two weeks ago, I told her "you're cheating on me". She of course denied it and I told her "You believe what you want to believe". I didn't specify that I suspect an emotional affair and I didn't say that an EA is an act of betrayal. Perhaps I should've. Finally, early on when she threaten divorce right after Easter, I made it clear to her that I wasn't OK with her meeting up with this guy for jogs as I suspected that she was growing attached to him. During this time I told her that I had phoned him and asked him politely to "respect our marriage boundaries". As we know, he hasn't.

With all that being said, is there anything to gain by pressing home the point that I know she's having an EA? Or have I already made it clear to her that I'm not OK with it. She's obviously going to do her own thing. I get that.

Given