Maybe She Isn't Evil

[RDS]

Hey RDS,

Are you seeing anyone for the panic attacks or taking any medication for them?

No, I'm not seeing anyone or taking any medications. When my W first left me I got prescribed some medication but I didn't like how it made me feel so I stopped taking it. The panic attack come and go. The attacks are associated with my job as well. It's high stress and it's the type of job of "what have you done for me lately" that keeps me on edge.

How are the GAL activities going in your new location? Any new co-workers that would be interested in hanging out?

Ashamed to say, but GAL has taken a back seat the last few months as I was concentrating on my move and getting settled in my new place. I have joined a couple of meetups and I hope to get out in the real world again.

I know dating doesn't sound right just yet, but some day someone will come along and you will know. Hell, it might even be your W. Use this time to heal and focus your energy on yourself so when that day comes, no matter who it is, they will recognize all that you have to offer.

I really want to get in the dating world again. I even joined Match and paid for it, but I cannot pull the trigger yet. I'm not ready for it.

My brother says when I finally do start dating and get that feeling of worth again it will make everything much better. I was 21 years old when I met my W and I still have the stupid feeling if I started seeing someone I would hurt my W. I know it's incredibly stupid to think that way, but it's the truth.

I know it s**** at times, but hang in there. Things will get better.

I know it will. Considering how I was last year compared to now I'm in a much better place. It's still not a good place but better than the last place.