Just some clarifications on my sitch: I am not living in the home. I moved out. H has two kids, and I am just me. He was making it unbearable for me to live there, and given that they are a family and I'm an outsider, I couldn't stay. I did my best to stay sane and calm while there and not give him more ammunition, but he wanted absolutely nothing to do with me. He had plenty of notice that I was going, but as he learned I was serious, he'd say "no one is making you leave".
He put down money on the house. I didn't. I was making payments toward it, and when I told him I was leaving, I told him that I wouldn't be making those payments because I could not afford two places at once.
He had been engaging in some magical thinking, where he thought the house would sell quickly, that he'd incur little financial consequences, and he'd get his "downpayment back." I can't tell you how many times I heard that phrase. This would be selling less than a year after we bought it, and it was a fixer upper. The only way to make money on it would be to make improvements. That was the plan for us to do for the next 5-7 years, until he got angry and simply had to end our relationship and sell the house.
I moved.
He was in a rush to sell, but isn't pushing it forward now. He has much more to lose in this than I do, especially if I pushed for half of the proceeds as we are on the title 50/50. Many in my life tell me to do that, and I just don't think I could be happy with myself if I did.
I got an attorney through my employer's Employee Assistance Program before I moved out. H was acting very irrational, and I was scared. I wanted to protect myself against foreclosure - again, not because I lose much, but my credit would tank.
H always had this vision of us working out the terms of sale, but after how he treated me he was the last person I wanted to trust. I wouldn't meet with him and he had to get his own lawyer.
So that's where I'm coming from. Also, we were not married, just making the plans to make that happen when he decided it all needed to end.
As for maximizing the selling price, that's nothing that I'm concerned about. I plan to ask for a flat fee. As for selling it quickly, I'm not making the payments and I've already moved, so that is also not something that I'm concerned about.
My heart aches through all of this, as it's not easy for me to think of H potentially suffering, but I did all I could to prevent him from getting himself into this mess, but he insisted. So now he's there, in the mess. There is really no reason for me to rush or to pay more to have my lawyer create agreements, right?
