We also dug into my need to see how much emotional pain I can handle. I expose myself to things that hurt, like ex's and their new partners to see if it hurts. It's a test to see how strong I am.
Ginger,
Does your IC believe that testing your mettle isn't beneficial?
She knows exactly why I am doing it and it makes logical sense, but really, I don't need to expose myself to it. I try to see what I can handle and test the waters. What she really wants me to learn to do is recognize pain is not weakness and that I deserve good things and I don't deserve the bad things.
Although........ I have a 95% chance of a tear in my ACL most likely requiring surgery. I am so depressed and in physical pain, tears are just flowing out of my eyes. Taking away my livelihood is going to push me back into depression.
The absolutely gorgeous orthodepic surgeon I just saw asked if I have any help at home. HAHAHA! I felt like saying "no, but you can come stay at my house, there is plenty of room in my bed!
