I guess the help I'm looking for now is to fight my way towards emotionally detaching, not just logically detaching if that makes sense. I need to build a new life. I need to be brave enough to stop secretly hoping for a miracle. I need to stop H being the first thing I think of when I wake up or talking to him in my head. And I need to do that a few weeks away from our D being final, while he is behaving like an idiot and a selfish child in the D process and while he is probably going to keep trying to pop back up on my radar.
I don't want to but I know I have to, if that makes sense. I need to feel like me again instead of the battered version. I want a life without lies and WTF and destruction and confusion and H seems to like living there, so he has to go. I don't regret a moment of our relationship, imperfect as all of them are, and I hate this inconceivable mess. But hating it doesn't change it. Maybe I want to detach too because I want to protect the things I treasured in our M and in my H before he finishes destroying my memories too.
Sorry this is so long.
Hello Treasur,
I'm so sorry for the situation you are in.
I went ahead and moved you to Newcomers so that more people will see your post and be able to offer support.
You are so smart to recognize the importance of truly detaching.
Knowing what to do and what not to do at this point is crucial. Feel free to give me a call at 303-444-7004 to discuss how we can best help you determine what to do next.
Cristy
Resource Coordinator The Divorce Busting Center 303-444-7004
A Divorce Busting Coach can help you save your marriage, even when your spouse wants out.
Email virginia@divorcebusting.com or 303-444-7004 for more information or to get started right away.
