When we tell our son that we're getting a divorce I want to make it clear to him that this isn't "Daddy's idea, but that I have to do what Mommy wants". Is this the right approach? I don't want to lie to him and give him the impression that I want a divorce.
Teppo,
My sons were 11 and 13 when we talked to them about the pending divorce. I told them that I didn't want the divorce, but mommy did. I told them why we were getting the divorce (they know the OM) and I told them why I kicked mommy out of the house well before the divorce. They didn't have to figure it out or guess; I laid it all out for them. There was no ambiguity.
I'm glad I did that and I'd do it again. Would I do it if they were 7 years old? Probably. I expect my sons to be truthful with me and they deserve the same from me.
