Boston Dad in need of Help

[Teppo]

It's been a few weeks since I posted. Here's an update.

I learned that my W has filed for divorce, so I'm expecting to be served papers any day now. I found this out by looking at her phone. I know, I shouldn't have looked, but now I won't be surprised when I receive them. She's filing for divorce even though we're still talking with our Deacon who specifically told her not to do anything rash.

When I found out that she was going to file I told her last Saturday night that "I'm sleeping in the master bedroom. I told her "Since you're the one that wants a divorce you should sleep in the guest room and that you don't deserve to sleep here anymore. I know I haven't been the perfect husband and if I hurt you along the way, I'm sorry. However you cheated on me". She sheepishly denied the affair (I should've specified an EA). I then said "You believe what you want to believe. I also said "you're the one that wants to leave the family, not me"and finally I said I was committed to you".

I've held my tongue for over 2 months and since she filed, I figured I've got nothing to lose by telling her to go to the guest room. Her EA is still ongoing. To be clear, when I told her to sleep in the guest room I said this calmly and without yelling or swearing.

Her mother is against the divorce and I've spoken to her about my feelings and how I suspect an EA. She doesn't seem to understand the significance of an EA and I've decided to stop talking to her about our problems.

Our Deacon is trying to arrange a meeting with her today, but I doubt she'll meet with him. I just can't believe that this woman who I feel in love with and is the mother of our son has come to hate me.





I know I screwed up by talking with her mom, but when she told me how distressed she was and how much she was against the divorce, I felt a need to talk to her. She confided in me her attempt at suicide when she was in her marriage, so I think I can trust her. Regardless, I'm not going to talk to her about the divorce moving forward. I've learned my lesson.