She has got a point. You arrived out of the blue with no notice. You also said she "owed" you a face to face which is all very pressuring. She was probably shocked you were there and didn't know how to handle it. I am sure lots of confusion and fear ran through her and while you were there she didn't know how to handle it because it was a surprise. Maybe, just maybe others were right that the sneak attack wasn't the best idea? Perhaps if this was planned, she would have had time to take it all in and sit down with you?
You said you did this all with no expectation. But your anger is because of what you expected to happen and it didn't, and something else completely different is happening. All your anger is from expectations. Of what you expected and didn't expect.
Right now you feel insulted, angry, and your ego is bruised.
When all that calms down, try to look at it from her shoes. It won't work until you calm down. You are feeling slighted because this did not play out the way your knight in shining armour plan was supposed to.
She wants to talk. Want don't you hear what she has to say when you are in a bettr place?
