Not great, but not the end of the world, T0. The answer might be as simple as getting a "how to live a great life after divorce" type of book and - oops - leaving it out.
Don't act embarrassed or ashamed; you're simply doing your homework and you feel you owe it to the kids to feel like you did your research about the future. When you have kids together, you don't take this stuff lightly (except for the waywards). That's the type of curious scholarly person that you are, after all. And you can say that to H if he brings it up. Otherwise, ignore, and carry on.
(But this also speaks to the larger conversation about him being around and a need for privacy.)
