You are getting such great advice. And your feelings of wanting him back are normal for right now. I have heard it said, that it might not necessarily be the WS that is in the fog, but the LBS that is in one after BD. All of our thoughts are geared around the WS. But why? They are not prizes.
Would you ever date a man that cheated on his wife with small kids? Would you ever date a man that left his wife when she was almost due? WS are showing us who they are through their actions. And yes. You can believe them.
I think a lot of us enter this fog, because its outside of our belief patterns and perspectives to fathom such disloyalty and break in commitment. We try to make excuses for their behaviors. He/She was depressed, an addict, entering a MLC, had a bad child hood, I (LBS) was awful and busy and sick and negligent, etc, etc. I think the truth is that you have some pretty selfish people out there that simply cant handle discomfort. And unfortunatly, its not always easy to recognize when things are going good.
"My H was someone I could count on WHEN things were good."
Yes, he sounds like a fair weathered friend. But is a fair weathered friend the type of person you want as a partner in life? Lets say you won millions of dollars in the lottery and You discovered this magic fountain that made you 5 years younger and made you look like a super model. And your ex came crawling back to you. Would you take him back, knowing that he can only be with you when things are good? When life is at its best?
Honestly, right now like everyone else is saying you need to get out of the fog and step away from him. Do whats in your best interest without any concern for him. Its exactly what he is doing. And in the future you will respect yourself for it.
