You're wrong again, I have put it into use when ever I have talked on the phone with my wife. I even made a cheat sheet.
Validation is a tricky subject. A lot of people here, and I mean a LOT, think they are validating when they're really not. As I said, I have seen nothing in any of your posts (and you have posted a lot of your text convos with W) that sounds even remotely like validation. I think you misunderstand what validation is. It is NOT complimenting someone. You've certainly done your lion's share of complimenting your wife's beauty, and that's great but that's not validation. And as 25 pointed out, to a WAS that can make them think "well yeah, but what's going to be your attitude when I'm not young and pretty anymore."
Instead of rushing so quick to call me (or anyone else here) wrong, just take a deep breath and read the comments again and ask yourself if there isn't something there you need to work on. We're just trying to help you buddy, this isn't a contest or a debate where someone is "right" and someone is "wrong". It's just people who have walked in your shoes (or are still walking in them) trying to help one another through this craziness.
I am fully aware that everyone is here to help me and I really appreciate it. I can't change the fact that you think I'm always defensive. One of the issues I find here is that no one in here truly knows the kind of person I am and how a I go about life. I know you only have to base it off of what I type.
What you read was that I do a lot of validating when I TALK to my wife on the phone and not when texting. There isn't a whole lot of things to validate on when we are not talking about us or the relationship and what went wrong. When I have actaully got her on the phone and got her to actaully start talking, again which is like pulling teeth, then I validate her a lot and all I do is listen and give validating responses when appropraite.
