Yes I am making plans to NOT count on him. That's something I learned from last time that he was unpredictable and frankly just didn't care about anyone but himself. Things seem to be taking a similar course as last time. Last time he continued to come around and slowly separated himself as things progressed with OW. But *I* am a different person at this stage. I may have made a lot of mistakes while H was in the home because I thought we were in a different place and that here was NO way he would leave me with this baby and while in school especially because he had said he wasn't going anywhere. Well now that I've realized I was wrong... it's a different story.
I'm working on letting him go. I think each day is a little better with minor set backs each day. I'm less emotional. I stop myself when I start getting worked up thinking about things. Yesterday he came by. I said hi first since he can't seem to say hi to me but decided a neighbor would be the bigger person and say hi. He came in and sat on the bed with the baby and I and S6. He asked S6 to go for a walk on the beach. I told him I was planning on leaving to give him some time with the kids. That I needed to leave at 815. He said ok. He asked if I would be around this weekend because he needed to go to a baby shower for the boss daughter (not the one he's been talking to but a different one). One he had never even met before until the last 3 weeks. I just asked if everyone fromcwork was going because he said they all pitched in on a gift.... I asked if he planned on taking the boys if it was a kid friendly place and I would take that time to study (I have an exam Monday). He said he didn't know he didn't even know where it was. So I just left it at that. He got in the shower and was in there well past 815 so I gave him til 830 and he was still in there so I just left while he was in the shower. I didn't come Home til 11. I asked how the baby was got in bed with the boys and he went to the couch. He asked what we were doing today. I told him we were taking the train downtown. He asked what time and suggested we leave earlier than I planned so we didn't miss it. I just said ok thanks.
So this weekend the boys and I will go about our plans. If H brings up taking them to the baby shower great if not I'll make arrangements to study at some point.
