There is one thing, re: Sandi's rules, that I am having trouble with. I don't know how to work this one atm. My W loves it when we do things together as a family. The talk we had the other night was after getting home from a family event with a whole heap of our friends. (This had been oprganised/booked for a long time). We had a good night. My W said she loved how we were that night. How our conversations were, how we interacted with each other etc. She loves doing things together with me and the kids.
Sandi's rules kind of suggest that I should put a stop to such things? With my W anyways. I feel that doing that would be detrimental to our MR and push my W further away? Spending more time with my kids and family is something I have wanted to change in myself for a long time. I have really worked hard and improved on in it in the past 8 months. If I start pulling away from it and cutting her out, wont that seem like I am falling back into my old ways?
Now I can see the arguments for it as well. This is creating a comfortable "family" life for her atm. Pulling away from family events together will likely be a shock to her system and make her start to realize that things like that will be going away and make her really think and question the path she is choosing.
Kids make all this even harder. How do I handle this situation?
