Please consider reading Not Just Friends. It tells a lot about where your walls and windows should be. You are determined at all cost to defend your affair partner, just like your WAW.
I realize that you're suggesting that for me to better understand something about myself, but having looked at it briefly, there is WAY too much pain there wrapped up in STBXW to get anything out of that other than more trauma right now.
After skimming the first couple of chapters, I feel like throwing up. I knew all of that intuitively half a year ago. Suspected some of it in the early stages. Knew it with complete certainty the day after ILYBNILWY. Asked STBXW what the hell she was thinking when she planned that trip.
Seeing it in print just makes me want to go away and curl up into a little ball.
