Her actions speak well of her character, not poorly.
So you think dating a married man speaks highly of her character? You're right that we don't know your entire sitch, but what we do know is you are one hard-headed son-of-a-gun. You are determined not to listen to ANYTHING we tell you. I told someone else a few days ago this same thing- all we can do is give you the tools. It's up to you whether to pick them up and use them or not. They're worthless if you leave them lying on the floor like you are doing now.
I dabbled on dating sites for a while after my D. A surprising number of the women's profiles said something along the lines of "do not contact me unless you have been divorced at least 2 years." Those are some smart women.
