Thanks I appreciate that. And yeah they were renting a small apartment but buying a house is a pretty big step. Its about 15 minutes from me.
And yeah you are totally right about mending one day, its just a blow ya know. Just a bunch of surprises. Walking into our house on October 7 and finding nothing and now shes getting a new one is bringing up some bad memories.
M 1.5 years, her affair was before 1 year T 7 Years
And the trip thing so far yes but I seriously doubt it now. She's back on one of those rants saying she wishes it could be us getting a new house etc. When she says all that it doom and gloom for awhile.
M 1.5 years, her affair was before 1 year T 7 Years
Wsh, well I prob won't be asking that but I have asked a similiar question under a similiar issue . Her response would be that she doesn't think our relationship could recover from such a mess we are in. She says my family hates her and that it would never be the same around them. I kept her leaving a secret from them for 6 months but when I found out about the A I broke down and told them. It's been a rough road for sure. I'm sitting here in a bit of pain. I knew it was coming and I also know that there is no way my M or me will get better without being completely destroyed. I think I have been destroyed enough. Time now to start new. I have nothing left to hold on to. Maybe she will like the new me. I'm sure we won't just never talk again. I'm really close to her family so we will cross again.
M 1.5 years, her affair was before 1 year T 7 Years
My family and friends live 45 minutes away. I moved to where I'm at for her and for her to be close to her family. I have 4-5 descent friends here but majority of my life is away from here. Home prices are 50% more in my hometown and I spent alot my money on stupid things to what I thought was going to make me happy during our seperation. I have handled this like total crap and I'm pretty worried about what to do now. I have some inherited land I could sell for a home but idk, thinking to much right now. Need to live day and day right now and worry about next steps later. Getting way ahead of myself.
M 1.5 years, her affair was before 1 year T 7 Years
Wsh I decided to ask her since it peaked my curiosity. Asked her can we buy a new house? Here's response:
"You're special to me. You always will be. I just needed more from a relationship and from life. There's things that I want that you hold me back from. You didn't want a nicer home, we both settled for that home. And while I do love our home, you never had any ambition to fix it up like I wanted too. I wanted to work on things and make it better. You were always complacent. "
She always liked nicer things than me. She financed a 35K vehicle and I paid cash for a 12K truck. She likes debt more than I do. She is going to do one of those 0% down home deals and finance all her furniture and tvs. She is trying to buy her happiness and I'm worried about her.
M 1.5 years, her affair was before 1 year T 7 Years
She likes debt more than I do. She is going to do one of those 0% down home deals and finance all her furniture and tvs. She is trying to buy her happiness and I'm worried about her.
I don't know the complete history of your sitch, but have you D or at least spoken with an attorney about protecting your finances from her splurges?
M - 9 1/2 years 5/5/16 - Bomb drop - 3 week EA 10/31/16 - We sold house 01/10/18 - D Finalized
My family and friends live 45 minutes away. I moved to where I'm at for her and for her to be close to her family. I have 4-5 descent friends here but majority of my life is away from here.
How about you try to place some new roots and make some new friends?
Your life will go on with or without her. I see no reason not to make the best of it.
Well I'm in a community property state so yeah that's a good point. I have a few L clients and I consulted with one. We can make our own property settlement which we informally did already. She took her stuff already and we are clean. I don't forsee any problems since all these purchases are not from comingled money. The most me and W discussed is me buy her a refrigerator and that would be it.
M 1.5 years, her affair was before 1 year T 7 Years
