My reasons to tell him would be that he knows he's not fooling anyone and that he is. It going to say LIKE LAST TIME that it didn't Happen until months after he left. That my gut feeling was right. That that is why he couldn't try for OUR marriage because he was too enthralled with someone else.
The reasons why I wouldn't say it - would it change anything? This M is over and I'll be receiving D papers if this continues to mimic the last time we went through this. I really don't know why it makes sense not to say anything. Because it will make him angry? It will give him more reason to hate me then he already does. Everything is already my fault. You should see the way he looked at me last night. First he can barely make eye contact and when he does make eye contact it's looking at me with such disgust. At this point am I really saving this M? No one in my life supports it. TBH the only reason I think I'm still here is because I want my kids to have their family together and I don't want to share them. Yes I do love H. BUT he doesn't love me. How would I live my life with every job wondering what female may tempt him? That oh have I give him enough attention so that he isn't noticing someone else.
I always told him he was such a nice guy and sometimes women take that as him meaning it flirtatious vs him just being helpful. He is so helpful and almost too nice to my female friends but we all know him. So I can imagine how a stranger that doesn't know him takes his attention of being helpful.
Anyway I guess this has gotten off track. I'm angry right now. He texts and asks what the boys are doing. Last week he had said he would come here every night. I said they were hanging out and we were thinking of going to a movie later. I asked what time he would be here because we would go to the 10pm movie. Now he says he has to work late. Which by the way. He's not even at work.
It's frustrating that he used to stay at work until 8pm and come home Late and now that he's left he's out by 5.
I'm angry that he can go from kissing my ILY sleeping next to me holding my hand while we sleep to erasing me from his life. He just leaves and wants nothing to do with me. My feelings are hurt. I feel like [censored] about myself. Why am I not good enough? Why is our family not enough?
