I would give different advice if you did not have a newborn baby to care for and had not just given birth (hormones/lack of sleep), and if you had less on your plate, and no weirdo dishonest h, and if you were calmer. T0, I also think you'd be calmer if you did not have these^^^ circumstances.
But you Do have these. They are so lousy & so unfair and yet they are real.
So maybe figure out Plan A for the short term needs. Not what you wish, Not what you fear ("don't want to be divorced..." etc) Just what you need right now.
If things settle down between you two, great!!
If there is still uncertainty that As you go along with Plan A, you figure out Plan B...for the long term. (Assume for Plan B, that your h is gone.)
IMO, which may vary from others, I would not give a rat's a$$ about an OW now, until some of the stressful factors above are addressed.
Because you need him at home with you as much as possible now - until you get Plan B formed & in place.
I'm not saying there's no hope. I am saying that Plan A would be STFU for now and get the other stuff on your plate, handled and Off the plate,
then go from there.
Plan B is for Future T0 to worry about.
Plan A is for T0 today/tonight and this week.
Time will show you the truth and if need be, Plan B will be revealed.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
