If I'm doing the right thing, why does it feel wrong? If I'm doing the healthy thing, why does it hurt? If I'm trying to heal, why do I feel more broken? If I'm trying to protect someone from me, then why did I hurt them?
You know the answer to this. The healthy thing might hurt in the short term, but will be the best choice in the long term. You are trying to heal through someone else, that's why you feel broken. It just doesn't work that way. You took the bandage off and it ripped off all your chest hair, and that hurts. Now you begin to heal. GF was going to feel the effects of this either way. You began a relationship while still in a marriage and just freshly left. You are sparing her more pain down now. You went on a date and held hands with your W while having a GF. being in that situation is worse for her. You did the right thing trying to resolve unresolved issues and healing yourself before you become a part of a couple yet again. I am sure she must have know risk comes with dating a married man.
You are grieving not one but the loss of two now. Which is why they warn against R's while still married and fresh. Please give yourself the time to heal and grieve. It takes time and it does come if you put the work into it.
