I'm so sorry. I imagine this was very painful to hear. I asked my H what we were doing about our situation after making him mad and knew exactly what he was going to say, wanted him to say it, but it still was a crushing blow when he said we should get started on the divorce.
I think we watch them and we see these signs that seem to point ot some kind of movement and then we are disappointed when they aren't. Yours sounds so much like he is in the throws of overt depression and I would think the things he says are even more unreliable.
I know when my H told me he didn't love me anymore I thought, of course not, you are scr**ing some other woman and spending all of your time talking to her and none of it near me or with me. How could you possibly have any feelings for me.
Yours sits in his smelly room isolated from the world and seems surprised that he can't emotionally relate to anyone. That alone is a sign of his problem.
Kudos to you for remaining calm. I think you know you can't trust what he says and you just have to keep plugging forward.
